Today marks Grandma's 8th death anniversary. Time has passed by a blink of an eye.
The last 2 Christmases sandwiched some bitter-sweet memories (all in God's grace), in the form of a relationship where I had experienced surprise, elation, fear, excitement, bewilderment, security, happiness, hope, fun, impressiveness, longing, attachment.. then came-- confusion, shock, disappointment, grief, deep sadness, emotional trauma, abandonment, some level of betrayal, etc. I could have imagined all these in my head to no one's making but they are real emotions, nevertheless. Even now I wished these would pass.. perhaps? (or when I breathe my last, i.e. when I stop being a human being!?) How I appreciate the peace of being away in solitude (escaped from reality) and experience full dependence on God, and being an "alien".. But well, it is truly grace that I went through the pain in order to experience growth, otherwise remaining as immature.
I am thankful for the re-discovery process of who I am in Christ, as increasing strength has found me, and new wisdom too. I trust more in God's plans; as I hope to be willing and ready with love in season and out of season (according to 1 Cor 13:4-8-- patient and kind; not envious or boastful; not arrogant or rude. Not insist on my own way; not irritable or resentful; Not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. ..never ends), no matter who God brings into my life. To carry the yoke of Christ, to follow Him in his footsteps of communing with the Father, in living out a life of redemptive brokenness and living sacrifice.
Jesus, you are my true security. God! I once was lost (and still gets lost so often..) but each time I know I can be found. In the coming year, I look forward to new challenges, becoming 35. **laughter with tears**
Monday, December 12, 2016
Friday, September 6, 2013
Teachers' Day
Today we celebrated (my second) Teachers' Day with class presentations and games. The K1 children whom I "parent", learned and said a prayer for the teachers. It went like this:
This is a phase of my life where I am learning about myself and others; gaining confidence in disciplining, leading and most importantly, loving; and looking forward to rewards of the heavenly kind - a transformation that resembles my Lord Jesus. Someone said to me: One who works with children becomes a better person. I like to think that way too. And this: One who works with children learns what his real character is, then move on with each realisation (how good or undeserving I feel/ think), to not dwell in yesterday's success or failure but embrace each day God gives for us to be with the children. They never remember and they always love and accept us without much bias. Indeed they are the best gift and blessing God has given to all who parent. "..they are new every morning, new every morning. Great is thy faithfulness O Lord, great is Thy faithfulness."
"Loving God, bless all the teachers. We know that being a teacher today is filled with challenges and we need your grace. Teachers are called to make the truth accessible and beautiful. Bless them with wisdom to realise Jesus in all they teach. Bless the families of all those who teach so that they may receive the support they need to remain faithful teachers and strong families. Amen."
Teachers are normal people who answer an extraordinary call.
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| The little gifts from the children and parents - the thought matters more than the cost. |
This is a phase of my life where I am learning about myself and others; gaining confidence in disciplining, leading and most importantly, loving; and looking forward to rewards of the heavenly kind - a transformation that resembles my Lord Jesus. Someone said to me: One who works with children becomes a better person. I like to think that way too. And this: One who works with children learns what his real character is, then move on with each realisation (how good or undeserving I feel/ think), to not dwell in yesterday's success or failure but embrace each day God gives for us to be with the children. They never remember and they always love and accept us without much bias. Indeed they are the best gift and blessing God has given to all who parent. "..they are new every morning, new every morning. Great is thy faithfulness O Lord, great is Thy faithfulness."
Sunday, January 8, 2012
New Beginnings
Last week, the class of 25 women started their 15-month Early Childhood course with Ms P. I am impressed by the ladies in this class, including myself, that we had chosen to put down whatever we had learnt or done previously to invest ourselves in learning for children. Talking about meaning in life! I think we are on our journey. :)
And in the 2 days with the 3-year olds in Noah's Ark, I think I am getting the hang of teaching these very little ones. Very thankful for Madam C as co-teaching partner, who is one of the most experienced teachers around. Writing lesson plans and preparing for class activities become a new 'past time'.
The weekend! On Saturday, our life group started the theme this year as 'New Beginnings'. Lammy brought us to the origin of the New T, which is from the Old T (Gen12:1-4). M got us thinking on one thing that we had never done and hope to do so in this new year. For me, I thought I might visit some friends in Nepal or some other places. The focus is 'Friends'. More likely, I will pay a visit to Sichuan this year.
Always I will hear teachers reminding me: 'You must be firm!' Oh yes, assertiveness is a trait I hope to master in good nature. E and I taught the pre-schoolers last evening about the miracles that JC did -- that we can be sure 'With God Everything is Possible' (Matt19:26b). I enjoyed the children more now, epecially seeing them having fun learning. Except for maybe 1 or 2 children who needed special attention. I really hope to understand them more through the EC course.
I do pray for a fresh anticipation of new things, like a little child.
And in the 2 days with the 3-year olds in Noah's Ark, I think I am getting the hang of teaching these very little ones. Very thankful for Madam C as co-teaching partner, who is one of the most experienced teachers around. Writing lesson plans and preparing for class activities become a new 'past time'.
The weekend! On Saturday, our life group started the theme this year as 'New Beginnings'. Lammy brought us to the origin of the New T, which is from the Old T (Gen12:1-4). M got us thinking on one thing that we had never done and hope to do so in this new year. For me, I thought I might visit some friends in Nepal or some other places. The focus is 'Friends'. More likely, I will pay a visit to Sichuan this year.
Always I will hear teachers reminding me: 'You must be firm!' Oh yes, assertiveness is a trait I hope to master in good nature. E and I taught the pre-schoolers last evening about the miracles that JC did -- that we can be sure 'With God Everything is Possible' (Matt19:26b). I enjoyed the children more now, epecially seeing them having fun learning. Except for maybe 1 or 2 children who needed special attention. I really hope to understand them more through the EC course.
I do pray for a fresh anticipation of new things, like a little child.
An Overview of 2011
As much fear I had when moving from somewhat like a familiar fishbowl to the large unknown sea, now coming back to Singapore after spending 2 years in China, was another experience of adjusting back. Reverse cultural shock per say.
The first 3 months of 2011 spent in TungLing was an experience I least expect. Thinking back are many divine memories with people of different background who gave up precious time to be together as God's family. I really misses those times and those people.
From April till August, I tutored 3 Chinese students under BY's guardianship which gave me a glimpse into the lives of these 15-18 year olds; and also understanding 7-year old Josh (May till December) and 9-year old Kryst (June till December). Considering 4/14, I was with JKC since April; Noah's Ark since end September. The last 3 months of 2011 was spent with the 5-year olds. With that, I decided to take up the Early Childhood course, after considering for 6 months.
The most traumatic part of adjusting back was to be staying with J for 3 months (19 Jun till end October), Ah Yi in November and K till mid November. Now being back home, I realised a lot about myself and am so much more thankful, in the knowledge of my God, who is faithful, understands me and gracious despite all my uncertainties.
I am also glad to be a part of the Christmas production with PKC, totally impressed with the youths' effort; and the Game of L was a meaningful finale of the year to reflect upon in the new year.
The first 3 months of 2011 spent in TungLing was an experience I least expect. Thinking back are many divine memories with people of different background who gave up precious time to be together as God's family. I really misses those times and those people.
From April till August, I tutored 3 Chinese students under BY's guardianship which gave me a glimpse into the lives of these 15-18 year olds; and also understanding 7-year old Josh (May till December) and 9-year old Kryst (June till December). Considering 4/14, I was with JKC since April; Noah's Ark since end September. The last 3 months of 2011 was spent with the 5-year olds. With that, I decided to take up the Early Childhood course, after considering for 6 months.
The most traumatic part of adjusting back was to be staying with J for 3 months (19 Jun till end October), Ah Yi in November and K till mid November. Now being back home, I realised a lot about myself and am so much more thankful, in the knowledge of my God, who is faithful, understands me and gracious despite all my uncertainties.
I am also glad to be a part of the Christmas production with PKC, totally impressed with the youths' effort; and the Game of L was a meaningful finale of the year to reflect upon in the new year.
Monday, August 1, 2011
Game: One Step At A Time
Yesterday had been a new level of understanding the pre-schoolers (3-6 year-olds) in the church basement. Apart from my earlier experience in China, I realised that E and I really should keep to 3 instructions at the most (1 or 2 directive and 1 hurdle). Many thanks to Ps Y, for being our guide and teacher, so needed by this team made up of teachers and helpers who have been amongst the youngest so far, to serve this generation.
The original intention of the game is to create an experience that is both physical and spiritual. And of course, to facilitate a sense of achievement and meaning for them with due directions, instructions and importantly, encouragement and motivation.
I like this idea as it is able to link to the lesson on the Road to Emmaus (Luke 24:13-35), and it gives me great joy to share with others, even to my life group last Saturday at LammyEve's place. I appreciate them for listening intently; M was able to give valuable feedback with his personal experience having being at the pre-schooler service with his son, S.
I am also thankful to the masking tape, the soft 'globe' balls and mini walking sticks so available for us to use from the backstage. Also, the sports shoes selflessly loaned by P and C.
The original intention of the game is to create an experience that is both physical and spiritual. And of course, to facilitate a sense of achievement and meaning for them with due directions, instructions and importantly, encouragement and motivation.
I like this idea as it is able to link to the lesson on the Road to Emmaus (Luke 24:13-35), and it gives me great joy to share with others, even to my life group last Saturday at LammyEve's place. I appreciate them for listening intently; M was able to give valuable feedback with his personal experience having being at the pre-schooler service with his son, S.
I am also thankful to the masking tape, the soft 'globe' balls and mini walking sticks so available for us to use from the backstage. Also, the sports shoes selflessly loaned by P and C.
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
First Anniversary of SC Earthquake
5.12 - which also happens to be my dad's birthday will most likely be a day not easily forgotten. He told me that when people ask him about his birthday, he will just say it is the same day as the earthquake. And that everyone now knows and remembers. I agree. A Sichuan friend actually sms-ed to wish my dad birthday too.
After news of the swine flu spreading to this particular part of the world, I decided not to go town as alerted by Alfred. I went down the street for a haircut, ate at my most frequent jiao zi shop at '三碗饺' and something more meaningful though brief - patronised a fruit shop with 2 ladies watching SCTV 2 direct telecast of the memorial ceremony for the earthquake last year. When paying for pears and mini watermelon (for reducing heat), I asked them about the programme. They were very much affected when they had watched what happened to their countrymen last year. However this time as they watched, they did not feel the same anymore. Indeed time have levied the pain or healed the wound, leaving behind a scar. As if it will speak a thousand words, I spouted a God bless you as I leave them to continue watching the parade segment.
After news of the swine flu spreading to this particular part of the world, I decided not to go town as alerted by Alfred. I went down the street for a haircut, ate at my most frequent jiao zi shop at '三碗饺' and something more meaningful though brief - patronised a fruit shop with 2 ladies watching SCTV 2 direct telecast of the memorial ceremony for the earthquake last year. When paying for pears and mini watermelon (for reducing heat), I asked them about the programme. They were very much affected when they had watched what happened to their countrymen last year. However this time as they watched, they did not feel the same anymore. Indeed time have levied the pain or healed the wound, leaving behind a scar. As if it will speak a thousand words, I spouted a God bless you as I leave them to continue watching the parade segment.
Monday, May 4, 2009
Scenic Emei Shan
I have returned early morning yesterday, in time for our weekly gathering, from having conquered Emei Shan during the Labour Day Period (a holiday period the locals call '五一', consisting of 3 days, from Friday till Sunday). Some will use these days to return home, affordably a few hours away. It was a rare opportunity for me to join Alfred, his dad and YF to visit this famous mountain which I had heard and seen only on television programmes.
On Friday morning we set off at 8a.m. on a 2-hour ride to 峨眉镇．Due to the holiday season, the price of a single-bed hotel room jumped to 4.5 times its usual rate! We decided to take the bus ride to and fro to the middle scenic area. If we were to climb the mountain, I heard we will probably need 1-2 days.
We woke up and set off from our hotel at 3:30a.m. on Saturday morning to find ourselves amongst hundreds of people waiting to buy their ticket outside the bus terminal. We climbed a short distance to take the cable car which finally brought us to the 金顶.
The view reminds me of the experience I had at Srigriya, Sri Lanka. The experience of His creation -- the traces revealing His presence. How I wished for those who paid their way in to enter into temples to bow their knees to created objects in the hope of having their wishes fulfilled, to be able to reckon the full sacrifice made for them to come directly to fellowship with their Creator who knows exactly the great things He had done, as well as the plans He has for each of them!
We took the same route back to the hotel, and then to the hot spring in the evening which really helped to ease the aching in our leg muscles. It was good for us to rest and set off the next morning at 6:30a.m. back to 新南门车站.
On Friday morning we set off at 8a.m. on a 2-hour ride to 峨眉镇．Due to the holiday season, the price of a single-bed hotel room jumped to 4.5 times its usual rate! We decided to take the bus ride to and fro to the middle scenic area. If we were to climb the mountain, I heard we will probably need 1-2 days.
We woke up and set off from our hotel at 3:30a.m. on Saturday morning to find ourselves amongst hundreds of people waiting to buy their ticket outside the bus terminal. We climbed a short distance to take the cable car which finally brought us to the 金顶.
The view reminds me of the experience I had at Srigriya, Sri Lanka. The experience of His creation -- the traces revealing His presence. How I wished for those who paid their way in to enter into temples to bow their knees to created objects in the hope of having their wishes fulfilled, to be able to reckon the full sacrifice made for them to come directly to fellowship with their Creator who knows exactly the great things He had done, as well as the plans He has for each of them!
We took the same route back to the hotel, and then to the hot spring in the evening which really helped to ease the aching in our leg muscles. It was good for us to rest and set off the next morning at 6:30a.m. back to 新南门车站.
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